Favourite Quotes

Quotes I’ve collected over time.

Life:

  • “Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people.” – Eleanor Roosevelt
  • “Reality leaves a lot to the imagination.” – John Lennon
  • “It’s never too late to stop procrastinating.” – Unknown source
  • “A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.” - Robert A. Heinlein
  • “Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren’t.” – Margaret Thatcher
  • “People get the government their behavior deserves. People deserve better than that.” – Richard Stallman
  • “I’m ok with failing. It’s probably one of my best traits.” – Jonathan Endersby (IRC)
  • “Were we perfectly acquainted with any object, we should never passionately desire it.” – The Gentle Cynic

Computers:

  • “Documentation is like sex: when it’s good, it’s very, very good; and when it is bad, it is better than nothing” – Dick Brandon
  • “If you need more than 3 levels of indentation, you’re screwed anyway, and should fix your program.” – Linus Torvalds
  • “I never imagined that the Free Software Movement would spawn a watered-down alternative, the Open Source Movement, which would become so well-known that people would ask me questions about ‘open source’ thinking that I work under that banner.” - Richard Stallman

Movies

  • “Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.” – Yoda
  • “I know everything hasn’t been quite right with me, but I can assure you now, very confidently, that it’s going to be all right again. I feel much better now. I really do.” – H.A.L.9000, 2001: A Space Oddysey
  • “I guess I could be really pissed off about what happened to me, but it’s hard to stay mad, when there’s so much beauty in the world. Sometimes I feel like I’m seeing it all at once, and it’s too much, my heart fills up like a balloon that’s about to burst. And then I remember to relax, and stop trying to hold on to it, and then it flows through me like rain. And I can’t feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life.” - Lester Burnham, from American Beauty
  • “Now, a staple of the superhero mythology is, there’s the superhero and there’s the alter ego. Batman is actually Bruce Wayne, Spider-Man is actually Peter Parker. When that character wakes up in the morning, he’s Peter Parker. He has to put on a costume to become Spider-Man. And it is in that characteristic Superman stands alone. Superman didn’t become Superman. Superman was born Superman. When Superman wakes up in the morning, he’s Superman. His alter ego is Clark Kent. His outfit with the big red “S”, that’s the blanket he was wrapped in as a baby when the Kents found him. Those are his clothes. What Kent wears – the glasses, the business suit – that’s the costume. That’s the costume Superman wears to blend in with us. Clark Kent is how Superman views us. And what are the characteristics of Clark Kent? He’s weak, he’s unsure of himself, he’s a coward. Clark Kent is Superman’s critique on the whole human race.” - Bill, Kill Bill volume 2
  • “Fuck Martha Stewart! Martha’s polishing the brass on the Titanic! It’s all going down, man! So, fuck off with your sofa units and your Strinne green stripe patterns. I say never be complete, I say stop being perfect, I say let’s evolve, and let the chips fall where they may.” – Tyler Durden, Fight Club
  • “That old saying, how you always hurt the one you love, well, look, it works both ways.” – Narrator, Fight Club
  • “Do I have an original thought in my head? My bald head. Maybe if I were happier my hair wouldn’t be falling out. Life is short. I need to make the most of it. Today is the first day of the rest of my life. I’m a walking clich». I really need to go to the doctor and have my leg checked. There’s something wrong. A bump. The dentist called again. I’m way overdue. If I stop putting things off I would be happier. All I do is sit on my fat ass. If my ass wasn’t fat I would be happier. I wouldn’t have to wear these shirts with the tails out all the time. Like that’s fooling anyone. Fat ass. I should start jogging again. Five miles a day. Really do it this time. Maybe rock climbing. I need to turn my life around. What do I need to do? I need to fall in love. I need to have a girlfriend. I need to read more. Improve myself. What if I learned Russian or something, or took up an instrument. I could speak Chinese. I’d be the screenwriter who speaks Chinese and plays the oboe. That would be cool. I should get my hair cut short. Stop trying to fool myself and everyone else into thinking I have a full head of hair. How pathetic is that. Just be real. Confident. Isn’t that what women are attracted to? Men don’t have to be attractive. But that’s not true. Especially these days. Almost as much pressure on men as there is on women these days. Why should I be made to feel I have to apologize for my existence? Maybe it’s my brain chemistry. Maybe that’s what’s wrong with me. Bad chemistry. All my problems and anxiety can be reduced to a chemical imbalance or some kind of misfiring synapses. I need to get help for that. But I’ll still be ugly though. Nothing’s going to change that.” – Charlie Kaufman – Adaptation
  • “Death is a natural part of life. Rejoice for those around you who transform into the Force. Mourn them do not. Miss them do not. Attachment leads to jealously. The shadow of greed, that is.” – Yoda, Star Wars
  • “You’re not a bad person. You’re a terrific person. You’re my favorite person. But every once in a while, you can be a real cunt.” – Bill, Kill Bill volume 2

Funny

  • “One of the great things about books is, sometimes there are some fantastic pictures.” – George W. Bush
  • “I hear there’s rumors on the internets [pause] that we’re going to have a draft. We’re not going to have a draft, period.” – George W. Bush

The Universe

  • Make everything as simple as possible, but not simpler. – Albert Einstein